Lament and Healing

Where do I even start? Today God spoke very loudly to many of our team members, starting off with a devotional on lament. It was a beautiful message which shared the uniqueness of Christian lament. Other people can grieve and mourn and be sad, but lamenting, or crying out to God in that pain is something only Christians do. Muslims do not pray to their god in their pain, they are left alone with it. Which is something that growing up as a Christian I have never even thought about. I cannot imagine going through the things I have gone through alone -- I am so incredibly grateful for the Comforter that my God is. And I knew that having a god to cry out to wasn't something everyone had access to, but I guess I didn't consider that other religions do not believe that they can go to their God in their pain.

Which makes the situations Muslim refugees face that much more terrifying, I'm sure. I'm not even in their shoes and it makes my stomach turn. That's one thing that we talked with our patients about today. After relieving their physical pain, what is their spiritual pain like? What hurts their soul? And what can anyone do about that? They talk a lot in mission training about cultural differences and how the message that we in America have all heard growing up may not be the most applicable message to other people, so don't just rely on things like "the Roman road" to get Jesus' message across. And I knew that Muslims were a very honor/shame culture so the right/wrong angle that resonates with Americans means almost nothing. I know I struggle with understanding honor/shame cultures, and as such, I am intimidated to try to put anything into that context.

But I do understand pain and suffering and loss. Not at all to the magnitude or scale that refugees do. But this perspective of God being the ultimate Comforter is something I have experienced and already love to share! He sees our pain. He has experienced human suffering. He knows. And He doesn't just leave us there to suffer in silence, He doesn't call us to be perfect before going before Him like Allah does. He wants to sit with us in our pain and suffering.

The devotional focused on the four main steps of lamenting that feel right to share here:

1. Turn to God. This is the thing that makes lamenting what it is. Turn to Him in your pain.

2. Acknowledge the pain. Something I am not very good at, but is so necessary. Using the very tangible examples we are seeing here, people have to acknowledge that they have a toothache before they can get it fixed.

3. Ask for help from God. Again, I am slowly learning this step too. Something interesting that they shared also was that in asking for help, we have to dare to hope that He will comfort and heal. Dare to hope. I love that.

4. Choose to trust. After asking God into our pain, acknowledging that it exists, and asking for His help, we have to choose to trust Him and His plan for our lives, whether that be relief from our suffering or not.

We also talked with our translators a lot — they are an AMAZING group of young women!!! Truly a massive blessing to the work we are doing and to me! But more on that later. We were joking about the dental chairs getting pulled for a search and how unassuming their owner looked and one of the Palestinian translators said that she was surprised she only got questioned this time. We gave her a questioning look and she kind of rolled her eyes and said, "I'm Arab, so they always think I'm a terrorist." We expressed our frustration with the system which she agreed with, but also reiterated that it really wasn't bad this time — all that happened was she got asked questions.

I asked her what normally happens and she said airports almost always take her clothes off and dump her suitcase. She said it in such a casual way, but I am constantly alarmed that things like that actually happen every day to people. It breaks my heart. It makes me mad. It makes me ashamed to be associated with the people and countries that treat her like that. But again, what can I do? I am one small person, and I am only here for ten days. So I find myself crying out to God for the people here and doing what little I can to encourage and uplift the people He places in my path.

She also explained a little of the situation in Israel from a perspective I have never heard before, and shared stuff that we don't hear about in the Western media. And again, I am appalled and frustrated and overwhelmed at the amount of suffering people cause each other. How can God still love humanity after everything we do to each other? And how can I be more like Him?

Healing

There are often times in my life where I see a stark contrast. Things so opposite in my head that are somehow existing simultaneously. Cats and dogs in the same house, for example — how does that ever work? ;)

Today was no different. There were many strong moments of lament, but there were also powerful stories of healing happening right in the midst! The ones you would expect were there — rotten teeth being pulled, a dislocated knee being put back in its socket, reading glasses being given for the first time, loads of prayer covering every willing person. But there were also some unexpected moments.

I always feel so weird in mission trips because sometimes it feels like I am receiving more than I am giving! That contrast again. Today, I felt more blessed by our translators than I can explain. We went out with them after dinner to talk and hang out, and they shared some of their stories and things they were passionate about, but it quickly turned towards me: what's my story? What has God been teaching me recently?

And so I told them. I shared the things that have happened over the past year, I shared that yesterday was the one year anniversary of getting my heart ripped out of my chest. But most importantly, I shared how incredibly loud God has been working throughout it all! He is my strength, He is my reason for living, He is my peace and my Comfort. And the whole time, all six of the girls were so invested in me, in hearing my story, and in praising God in His power!

Near the end, they all kind of gave each other a look and said, can we pray for you? Of COURSE I said yes :) and they all gathered around me (in the middle of a Viking pub in the center of a shopping district in the Middle East!!) and held my hands and put their hands on my head and started praying. And boy were they fighting the devil! They prayed with so much passion and conviction. They prayed for things I did not mention that the Holy Spirit must have given them.

I wish I could remember every single word spoken, but only a couple of pieces stuck in my head. They prayed for healing over my body and whatever is causing all of my health issues. They told God that they knew I was made to do great things and prayed that He would continue the work He had already started in me. They prayed for my ministry and that I would be effective wherever He places me.

And most amazingly, they thanked God for the warfare. They praised God that I am fighting the devil's schemes, because the bigger the battle, the greater the harvest. They prayed that the warfare would continue because that meant I was going in the right direction and they prayed protection over me, that I would resist the evil, and always keep my focus on God.

Guys, I was sobbing (and they then took a picture with my snotty face because they were so happy ;))

We also prayed for our server who was this sweet national lady! She was so excited to have us pray for her! Which was super surprising for me! The translators asked me to lead the prayer which was intimidating, if I'm being honest. Especially after their war cry of a prayer (maybe it was because we were in a Viking themed restaurant ;)) when we finished praying, she was crying and thanking us over and over. We took a picture together and told her we would be back tomorrow! (She sells her own handmade perfume, so we HAD to come back for that)

God so richly blesses us, even when we aren't looking or expecting it. I came here to serve. And I will continue to serve, but God blesses me in so many tangible ways all the time. And thank goodness He does, because I am slow to learn and quick to forget.

Lament and healing. Two seemingly opposite concepts which are often two sides of the same coin. Healing cannot exist without brokenness. Both important. God is good in both.